His Name Is Dean Winchester
by infidelis-gossamer
Summary: Castiel Collins is what you could call an addict. He's lived next door to Anna Milton and her husband for years, however he's never managed to actually meet the man. Turns out, his name is Dean Winchester, and he might just be able to see past Castiel's glazed eyes and find the person he used to be.
1. Chapter One

Ahh, how he loved the way the light shone in through the windows, disturbing him from his slumber. It was just great. Also great was the alarm clock blaring away, inches from his face. It was stopped soon enough, though, considering how he snatched it from the bedside table and threw it to the floor. He slowly sat up in his bed, proceeding to step onto the wooden floor and stand. Broken glass from the alarm clock embedded itself into his skin, and he turned, walking towards the bathroom door.

Looking in the mirror, he let out a quiet sigh. Who was he? Well, his name was Castiel. It wasn't like anyone called him by that name, but it was on his birth certificate as well as his license. Speaking of which, he seemed to recall having his license taken away the other day. It wasn't like he used it that much anyway. His gaze swept over his dark, messy hair, his old and worn out shirt and sweatpants. He reached onto the counter, grabbing his silver glasses and putting them on. Glancing down, his eyes found that the floor was red with blood. Well, he should probably clean that up before anyone comes over, huh. He'd do it later.

After a few moments of staring blankly at the ground, Castiel quickly removed his glasses, letting them drop to the counter as he rushed over to the bathtub, proceeding to throw up.

The blue-eyed man shut the door to his house, stepping out into the cold, winter air. By now he wore a dark shirt, jacket, and pants, as well as black sneakers and a scarf. Honestly, he could have much better clothes if he wanted. He had a nice house on a nice street, plenty of money, but his clothes weren't always the best. Hey, it wasn't like he had to show off to anyone, right? Might as well be comfortable. Castiel stepped off of the porch, into the deep snow. He knew that he was shivering, but he didn't bother to go inside and find another jacket. Instead he continued on, walking along the snow-covered sidewalk to his neighbor's house.

Castiel knocked on the door, his unfocused eyes fixed on the windows. He waited. A few minutes went by, half an hour, an hour, he stood and waited, growing colder and colder each minute though by now he was sweating, for some reason. After an hour he knocked once more, though didn't stand by the door, instead moving to look through the windows. Were they home? They had to be. The car was here, and the lights were on inside. Did they have someone over? Were they busy?

He tilted his head to the side, turning to step off of the porch. They were home. No one new was over, they weren't doing anything important. He could hear voices and noises coming from the inside, though they were the sounds of the TV and the people who lived there. Nothing new. So why didn't they answer?

The raven-haired boy shrugged to himself, letting the question go as he walked back to his own house. It only took a few minutes, and once inside, he walked to the couch, letting himself fall onto it. He reached into his jacket pocket, taking out a cigarette and his lighter. After lighting the cigarette, he closed his eyes, taking a long drag of the dark, spiced smoke.

Castiel awoke hours later, to a dark, cold house. Well, he hadn't made a fire, so he supposed it was to be expected. He hadn't meant to sleep that long, though, hadn't meant to sleep at all-his cigarette was out, though, and the house wasn't ablaze. He took that as a little victory. He stood, extending his arms upwards in a stretch as he walked closer to the fireplace. After setting the fire, he simply watched it for a few moments, then turned to go back outside. This time he walked to the left, to his other neighbor's house. They'd answer the door, he was sure.

"Hello? Oh, hey there, come on inside, I'm boiling some water for hot chocolate."

A woman greeted him at the door, smiling at him fondly. Or, he thought so. Castiel nodded, wiping his snow-covered shoes on the mat before stepping inside. He turned his head, blue gaze scanning over the woman. She had long, red hair, and light brown eyes. Her name was Anna Milton, and Castiel had known her ever since she moved into this house with her husband a few years ago. Whom, even though Castiel was over here a lot, he'd never met. He was always at work, apparently. But according to Anna, he was charming, funny and an overall good person.

Anna lead him into the kitchen, where a large table resided, then to the right was the actual kitchen, where he could hear water boiling. Castiel sat down at the table, noticing that he couldn't hear the normal sounds of children inside the house. At school, maybe? Though he figured that school was cancelled today, due to the snow. Anyway, that was the reason the table was so large-Anna had three kids, though their real father had died long ago, and so she remarried some man named.. what was his name, again?

"What is your husband's name?"

Anna seemed to perk up at that, smiling brightly at Castiel. "His name is Dean Winchester."


	2. Chapter Two

Dean Winchester, hmm? Apparently Anna hadn't taken on his name, because her name was still Anna Milton. Of course, that could be due to the fact that her husband had passed away, and maybe she had wanted to keep his name, in his memory. But then again, maybe not.

Castiel nodded in response, taking the hot chocolate when she handed it off to him.

"How come I've never met him before?"

"Oh, he works a lot. He goes to work early and doesn't get home until around four. Oh, he should be home any minute! I'll boil some more water for him."

Anna turned back to the stove, grabbing the pot and filling it up with more water. Afterwards she made her way back to the table, sitting down across from Castiel. She took a long sip of her hot chocolate, studying the raven-haired man in front of her.

"I've told him a lot about you. Would you stay to meet him?"

And what kind of things did she say? He shrugged the question off. Ah, to stay or not to stay.. well, he supposed he could. The only thing he was supposed to do today was clean the blood and glass from the floor, but that seemed like a boring and dreadful task.

"Sure."

Minutes after the conversation, the front door opened, letting in the cool air and bright light. How the snow wasn't melted, Castiel had no idea. It had been sunny every day for quite a while now. Anna stood from her chair, running over to the door and practically jumping into a man's arms. Dean Winchester's arms, he assumed.

Dean gave her a kiss, smiling at his wife before taking off his jacket and setting down his briefcase. His gaze moved around the house, stopping when it reached the kitchen.

"Is someone here, Annie?"

"Deaan, I told you not to call me that. Yes, though, Jimmy is here."

Castiel couldn't see them, but he could hear their words. The slight suspicion in Dean's tone, the reassurance in Anna's. Soon enough both of them walked into the kitchen, Anna going to make Dean's hot chocolate while he looked over Castiel. He held out a hand to the seated man, giving him a polite smile.

"I'm Dean. I've heard a lot about you, Jimmy."

Castiel's unfocused gaze examined Dean's hand, looking over it for what seemed like hours before finally taking and shaking it. His blue gaze moved upwards, to meet Dean's green. And god damn were they green.

"Good things, I would hope."

Castiel took notice of Dean's hesitation, narrowing his eyes slightly at the standing man.

"Yes, of course. Ah, I should probably go take a shower. I'll see you around, Jimmy."

"But I just made your hot chocola-"

"Yeah, and thanks, but I've had a long day and a shower would probably calm my nerves."

Dean turned, smiling once again at Castiel before walking into another room, which he knew to be the bathroom. The raven-haired man turned his gaze back to Anna, watching her with a blank expression. He stood, not bothering to say thanks for the hot chocolate or anything.

"Goodbye, Anna."


	3. Chapter Three

Castiel hadn't spent too much time thinking about Dean's words. His hesitation. So what exactly had Anna been saying about him that made him hesitate? Ah, he was thinking about it again.

He sat down in front of his fireplace, raising his hands to warm them by the fire. Something had been strange about Dean. Though, then again, his perception of "normal" might be a bit off. Dean had seemed.. well, he seemed like he was uncomfortable. And not just around Castiel, but around Anna, and simply being in the house. His blue gaze fixed on the flames, wondering exactly how hot they were. He could burn this house down, if he wanted to.

Castiel went to bed soon after that, making his way to his room and leaving the fire burning. It was still cold as hell in here, even when the fire was going. He shivered slightly, falling onto his bed and quickly getting under the covers. Maybe he could go over again tomorrow, and see Dean again. He could see if that was just his natural attitude, or if he was simply uncomfortable with being around everyone.

He awoke later than the day before, not only because the curtains were closed, but also because the alarm clock was broken. Oh, it was still all over the floor. He still needed to clean that up, along with the bloody footprints he'd made-Shit. Had he even remembered to get the glass out of his feet?

Castiel made his way downstairs, finding that the fire was out and soon setting another one. He glanced around for a blanket, and once he found one, wrapped it around himself, looking much like a catarpillar. But hey, he wasn't one to judge for looks. He went into his kitchen, deciding that he should probably eat something for breakfast. Or... maybe not. Castiel darted to the trashcan, letting himself throw up like he had the day before.

Ughhh, and his head hurt like hell. Castiel got himself a glass of water, opened up the cabinets, then took down two orange bottles containing different types of medications. He got four pills of each, putting them into his mouth and taking a drink of water. The raven-haired boy then assembled some sort of breakfast for himself, which consisted of random things, such as bread, uncooked noodles, anything he could find, really.

A few hours later, he decided that it was time to check out the neighbors again. It was about three, so he still had time before Dean was home. He could go over to his other neighbors first, and see if they answered today, then if not, he could go see Anna. With that thought in mind, Castiel put some shoes on, not bothering to check if glass was still embeded in his feet from yesterday. He couldn't feel it anyway, so it didn't really bother him.

He went outside, the big blanket still wrapped around him. Castiel trudged through the snow, to his neighbor's house. He knocked on the door a few times, then proceeded to wait again. They didn't answer, and after about ten minutes, Castiel stopped waiting. He turned, fully intent on going to Anna's house.

When he was walking towards Anna's house, Castiel turned his head, eyes looking out at the road. What.. what the fuck was that? He could just see a bunch of lights, nothing more. He debated whether or not he should just use his blanket like a cocoon, maybe turn into a turtle, though decided against it. He squinted, trying to make out what was behind the lights, which were clearly pointing at him.

"Jimmy? Jimmy, is that you? Are you alright?"

Okay, who the fuck was asking? Of course he wasn't alright, they were shining their damn lights in his eyes. Suddenly, the lights faded out, and all he could see was a blur. Ah, he had forgotten his glasses.

"You, ah, you look like you're about to pass out, come into the house."

He didn't want to go to some stranger's house. Especially not a stranger who shined lights in his face. Castiel wrapped the blanket tighter around himself, still trying to make out who was in front of him.

"J-Jimmy, come on! Don't pass out on me now."

Castiel let himself sink to the ground, not really knowing why but not caring to find out. He felt something around him, maybe someone was holding him? Carrying him? He leaned into the stranger's chest, letting his eyes close.


	4. Chapter Four

God damn, where was he?

It was warm, wherever he was, so he was thankful for that. It felt as though he was laying down somewhere, wrapped up in blankets, listening to a fire crackling right next to him...

Castiel opened his eyes slowly, blinking a few times to clear his vision-well, clear it _more, _he supposed. It was never quite clear, his dark blue eyes always glazed over and his pupils always either pinpointed or dilated. Today? Well, today he wasn't quite sure what they looked like. Or even what day 'today' was. Certainly he hadn't been out for that long though, right?

After a moment, the raven-haired man jolted up into a sitting position, eyes widened and locked on the glowing fire in front of him. Shit, he was actually right next to a fire? I mean, he'd wanted one sure, but really? Castiel breathed out a little sigh, looking down at himself and finding that he was indeed wrapped up in blankets, too. And... on the floor. That was certainly graceful. He turned his head, glancing about the room and trying to figure out where the hell he was, but alas, he had absolutely no idea what this place was. It wasn't his weird neighbor's house, and it wasn't Anna's. He looked to the door when it opened, a somehow familiar-looking man walking into the room.

"Uh, hey. How are you feeling?"

Well then. Castiel furrowed his eyebrows, staring right at one Dean Winchester.

"...What?"

"I mean, uh, are you feeling better? At all? You looked pretty bad earlier."

Ah, good, so he hadn't been out for too long, if he had only blacked out a bit earlier. But something irritated him, and he needed to know.

"You just picked me up off the sidewalk because I looked pretty bad? That's really wise. I mean you _did_ only meet me yesterday, and obviously we have a lot of trust in each other, right? So why not pick me up and bring me to some weird place?"

It was Dean's turn to sigh now, breathing out heavily before moving to sit on the couch, which was right next to the part of the floor Castiel was sitting on. Hey, if he'd had that couch in here the whole time, why didn't he fucking put _him _on it? After all, he was the one who had 'looked bad.' Dean here didn't seem to feel that bad, and he certainly didn't look it. No, he looked absolutely hot. Not that Castiel was interested-Dean was Anna's husband, and Castiel knew how much Anna loved him.

"Uh, sorry about that. But you looked like you were gonna freeze to death, you know? I figured it'd be better for you in here."

"And where exactly is 'here?'"

"My house."

"Your house. Hm. Well, last I checked, you lived with Anna."

Dean brought a hand up to his forehead, wiping it across and looking a bit exasperated. God, he'd only asked a question.

"...Yeah." Ohhh, was that hesitation Castiel heard there?

"Yeah, I live with Anna. This is just.. my old place. I was coming here to uh, you know, get the last of my stuff."

Castiel couldn't help but narrow his eyes, turning slightly to look at the other man better. "Dean, you've been married for like five years. If you were going to get your stuff you would have gotten it years ago."

Dean raised his eyebrows slightly, giving a little nod of agreement. "True."

He seemed to notice his mistake though, and quickly shook his head, looking to Castiel with an expression of.. well, he wasn't quite sure what kind of expression that was.

"I-... don't tell Annie, okay? This is my house. I, uh.. I go on "work trips" a lot, and um, I spend a lot of extra hours at work? In reality I just come here."

Mm, Castiel could understand why he'd want to do that. Anna was nice, friendly, and all that, but she could get absolutely infuriating when you were around her for a while. That voice of hers just gave you headaches. But still, why the fuck was Dean telling him this? He had kind of asked, but.. well you didn't just go around spilling secrets to some guy who was _friends with your wife,_ who you were _talking about._

"Mmhmm," Castiel began, "and why did you bring me here, instead of to Anna's house?"

Dean seemed at a bit of a loss, here. He ran a hand through his hair nervously, giving a little shrug.

"I don't know. I just thought you'd be better off here."

"Very kind of you to put me on the floor while I was asleep. Right next to the fire, too, I could have just rolled right into it."

"Oh, shut up. I wasn't really thinking about it, okay? I thought you were dead or something. You weren't really breathing for a few minutes, and it was just.. weird."

At that, Castiel could feel the corners of his mouth curve upwards in a smirk.

"So does that mean you gave me mouth to mouth?"


	5. Chapter Five

Ohhh was Dean flustered by that. And it was just a simple question, too. Castiel could see the other man's cheeks redden, and he opened his mouth a few times to speak but ended up closing it again every time. After a minute or two he finally seemed to get the confidence to talk again, and Castiel couldn't help but feel a bit of pride.

"N-no, I'm a married man, I don't just go around giving weird guys mouth to-"

He stopped, shaking his head before blowing out a heavy sigh. He dropped his gaze to his hands, "Yeah. I did."

"See? That's all you needed to say. It's not like I asked if you wanted to frick frack or anything."

Dean looked up again at that, an eyebrow raised in confusion.

"Frick frack?"

"Have sex."

Realization swept over the other man's face, which was just reddening once again as he stood, moving to walk slightly away. "Okay, whatever. Uh, just, get warm. Or uh, tell me how you feel." Dean gave a nod after his words, as if confirming them. "Yeah, do that."

Castiel just gave a shrug. He was completely content with just sitting here by the fire in this nice blanket, making comments to make the other man flustered. It was kind of cute, really, how just bringing up sex made the other man blush. His blue gaze followed the green-eyed man as he went to sit down once again, locking his own eyes on Castiel and awaiting his answer.

"I feel fine, I guess. I need a smoke, and I've got a bit of a headache, but that's about i-"

Castiel quickly stood, throwing the blanket off of himself and rushing into what he figured was the kitchen. It was, apparently, if the cooking and refrigerating appliances had anything to do with it. He went immediately to the sink, as it was closest, and let himself vomit. He didn't understand how he threw up all the time, I mean he barely ate anything. Not that he had a problem with eating, he just could never really remember to make anything for himself. He didn't hear the approaching footsteps, but he did in fact feel it when a hand was placed on his back, rubbing gentle circles to it. And it was actually pretty comforting, if he thought about it. Not that a whole lot could be comforting while you were vomiting, but you know. It helped.

After a few minutes he was okay again, and Dean moved away, after a moment handing him a glass of water.

"You're fine, hm?"

"Shut up. I am fine. Just an upset stomach."

He took a long sip of the water, simply going to spit it out into the sink to get the taste out of his mouth. He did this a few times, until the water was gone, and Dean went to clean the edge of the glass he'd used, filling it up with clean water and handing it off to him again. This time he actually swallowed it, the liquid bringing comfort to his burning throat.

"Thank you, though." He muttered after setting the glass down, bringing his blue gaze up to look at Dean once more.

"No problem. Do you want anything to eat? ...Well actually nothing probably sounds very appetizing right now but you know. When you're feeling a bit better."

"I'm okay. I just.. need to get home. I think I might have left the fire going or something."

He turned to walk out of the kitchen, and Dean followed, which okay honestly it irritated Castiel a bit. What, did he not think he could take care of himself? ...I mean he wasn't very good at it, but he wasn't dead, right? And it wasn't like he was suddenly going to die right now.

"I'll go with you." Oh. He.. wanted to go with. Okay. Castiel didn't really know what to say to that.

"Attached to me already? Dean, I'm flattered. But I really must go alone, the house is a mess and I must clean it up before I have company over." Which wasn't a total lie, considering he still hadn't cleaned up any of that broken glass, or the bloody footsteps he'd tracked through parts of the house.

"Cut the crap, Jim. You don't look well enough to be by yourself, so I'm going with you."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I meant it when I said the house was a mess, though."


End file.
